So you think you are a social media expert?

30 November, 2009

Social Media, Social Media, Social Media. I want you to actually stop and think about those words for a minute and separate them.

Social - living together in groups, typically in a hierarchical system with complex communication.

Media - the plural form of medium or 'mediums'; the main means of mass communication

Let's think of some synonyms.

Imagine if it was called communal publishing? or community broadcasting? What about community conversation?

What feelings do these phrases evoke and how do you see them in your head? Are you seeing people yelling in a town hall or propaganda flyers in letterboxes?

Many business, marketing, advertising, design and general armchair 'experts' around the world have united in proclaiming to understand social media with their arsenal of tools, analytics and buzz word cannon fodder.

Yet watch them personally have a conversation with anyone - are they any good at holding an interesting, two way conversation where both walk away enriched and with a new connection, or are they just boring and selfish and say the same old stuff? Look deeper again - do they talk at people, to people or with people?

It seems that in the hoo-har (?) of social media, we've forgotten an important fundamental principle. It's about a being able to hold an engaging two way conversation in a community of people to communicate a message using amusement, entertainment and stories. And yep, most people are crap at it.

Maybe you're a selfish communicator?

When did you last attend a barbecue where there was a person who didn't shut up about themselves, wanted all your feedback about them and then when you went to speak, interject or rebut, they walked away and even ignored you? They think they're cool, whilst you just smile politely and think they're a selfish jerk. 'But I don't act like that Paul! I'm not a selfish jerk!' I hear you say. 'Speak for yourself but these aren't the kind of conversations I have', you retort indignantly.

Okay perfect. So what you're saying is that you understand the dynamics, nuances and depth of having a personal conversation so people like and understand you? Well that's great then!

So why do many think that the web - the 'social medium', is about leveraging people for their business's own pure benefit by not doing anything 'socially' different and thinking a whole crowd of people will be gagging to give them their business because they 'spent some money' to gain a prospect's attention?

Okay okay so I admit I'm being confrontational and you're already brainstorming your lengthy response, but please stop and think about it because it's really important.

I want you to close your pocket book of killer corporate buzz words for a while, to not get distracted by all the tools to measure the wattage used per tweet and remember that a relationship worth fostering for the long haul is a relationship built in time with trust, respect and love. It's unlikely to start as a quick romp on the bonnet of your mum's Civic.

So what is my moral of the story?

If you want the best FREE 'social media tip', start a conversation WITH people. Engage your brain into being a more interesting, more effective and genuinely considerate conversationalist.

Be the social butterfly and you'll be surprised how much things will improve for you both on and offline. Remember, it's not all about you.